crickets + calla lilies
Val Esway + Maw Shein Win

#1
could hear the crickets through the phone line
& feel the pavement inside the bones
could see the outlines of clouds
as I slept on the plane, no rain
worrying winds picked up pace &
I closed my eyes & hoped for grace
a slice of light through the pane
opened a box on my lap
I didn’t want to know what would be revealed
so I slammed it closed & pulled the shade
tea kettle whistle in the dim kitchen
I lit a honeycomb candle
slivers of silver crackling & whipping
around the edges of my eyelids
lashes flashing in the dark
morning bed
christmas morning fog, bad music
dog curled up on couch while washing machine spins
sound of bells on the collar, a spinning
sensation already
sinking into the unknown,
welcoming it like a treasured friend
holding a note in my head
that I remember & then I don’t
it floats around the edges
ebbing & flowing
around a bend
I touch the bark’s surface
watching a paper cup
dance down the street
spin in the ether
a message reveals
something familiar
like a fragment of a dream
wondering if I’m
in between bed & sky
savoring the sensation
suspension, surrender, sublime
I slip between cloud
sheets, sleep for a while
thirty seconds or seven hours
surfing in time, space
& dream, I imagine
another possibility
& wake, see the world
w/ new eyes, rise & march onward
rain on our skin
we walk to the light
dazzled by the possibilities
a long path of open doors
that lead to more
doors, we hold out our hands
& catch the sparkles
raining down like candy
I wake from a dream
sleep talking at night
trying to grasp
the detritus of other worlds
in a liminal space
together we dream
we are flying
above stars
& under the milky way
held by silence
we become the light
we have always been
a total solar eclipse
we look up

#2
coffee mug, calla lilies, pepper shaker
dining room table is a desk
it’s where I begin
fan blades spinning
plucking guitar strings
ice cubes clinking in a glass
listening to old songs
that make me cry
another glass of wine
another headline
same as yesterday
time to smash things
against the white walls
men w/ their pens
and their guns
an old & tired story
rinse & repeat
this chorus is boring
let’s change this
up, find another
song before too long
move our bodies
in the garden planting seeds
dancing to bowie
dancing to bauhaus
watering succulents
on the balcony
popping dark chocolate
peanut butter cups
an antidote to today’s ails
soaking in tub
lavender bath salts
eyes closed
shut out the noise
focus on breath
there is only this moment
together across
tabletop, sparrows on
lawn, birch tree still there
leathery skin
a bit worse for wear
we are still here